Monster Wellness
Health + Wellness might seem a foreign concept to some of us. I say “us” because it was foreign to me as well. It was not even a second or third thought for me. And just look at me now, pretending to know it all. Well, actually, I know some, and if you are willing to walk with me, I can walk with you, and no one has to get their doughnut smacked out of their hands. I don’t do that.
Do you know what I did with my broken back that I walked around in for 20 years? I got it patched up and became a yoga teacher.
Do you know what I did with zero healthy habits? I got certified to teach Ayurveda (a 5,000-year-old system of self-care).
Do you know what I did when I escaped a narcissistic family? I got board-certified to be a health & wellness coach. That’s the official title. I think it should be called “ board-certified sherpa.” We (as board-certified coaches) carry the heavy things for you, so you can feel what freedom feels like-sometimes for the first time.
This is where you decide what you want, and I help you get there. You decide for yourself. We can come up with a plan where you set the parameters. You set the pace, the tempo. Everything. I walk with you until you are ready to walk alone again. You are the doer of hard things. Let me help you a wee bit. I can see how hard it has been for you.
No cold sells. No hurry-up, already. We take it one step at a time. One diagnosis at a time. One challenge at a time. We get there when you are ready to get there.
What Sets Us Apart
You go to different rooms and buildings when you want to see your doctor for your (insert body part here). Why? Because Western Medicine has compartmentalised human beings into expressions of 15-minute appointments ending with a prescription being sent to your local drug dealer.
What if you could actually work on the symptoms without getting 14 side effects? Yeah, that’s what we do here. Drugs are vital in acute cases. Western Medicine is vital in acute cases. After care…That’s another story entirely. Mental wellness, Mindset, Movement, Proper Nourishment, and Self-Care all weave a fabric for your health. This is where you take control, and this is where we start walking together.
Meditation
Prayer is when you are talking to God. Meditation is when He is talking to you. Explore meditation to find the stillness that is already there. No, we don’t empty the mind. We start with the heart, move to the soul, and allow the brain to take a breath. No religion. Promise. I can’t help it if God is the Source of it all.
Self-Care, Simplified.
Ayurveda, more commonly known as Self-Care, is the foundation of health. Here you will learn a 5,000-year-old system of self-care that allows you to show up for yourself and your doctors. It’s not magic, it’s self-maintenance. You will know it’s working when everyone around you mysteriously gets ill, and you do not. The moment you scratch your head, it will hit you.
Breath-Work
Considered ‘movement’ in Ayurveda, Pranayama is another form of self-care that focuses on restorative care for the vagus nerve, aligning with the polyvagal theory, which explains how our autonomic nervous system unconsciously evaluates our safety to regulate our behaviours and emotions. Take care of it, and it will take care of you.
Trauma-Informed Yoga
Come as you are. Broken. Traumatized. Unable. This is your time. We make the posture fit your body and not the other way around. I create a customised routine for you to move at your pace, in your space, and with your body. The studio is in your home. If I, with my broken back, can become a yoga teacher, you can sit for the class. Plus, it’s only us.
Our Packages
I mean, seriously! Where do you even start?! If you are reading this, either things have gone very pear-shaped, or they have gone unexpectedly well. Whichever end of the spectrum you are on, I’ve got you. It’s not easy finding your next step. I get it. It’s dark and scary, and everyone wants something from you, and there has got to be a reset and rest button somewhere, right? RIGHT?!
Yes. We do that here. You are exactly in the right place. Here we build your life on a plan.
We cover all the categories and then some. We go for the jugular. Finances. HI-YA! JUDO CHOP!
Relationships ANOTHER! JUDO CHOP!
Career RAWWWWWWR
Family-the real terrorists. I know.
Friends, where even are they right now?
Health always last on the list. Let’s help you make that a priority.
You get one 90-minute sesh. Need more? We can always put you in a lifestyle package. The first one is gonna set the standard.
I’ve got techniques, and I am not afraid to use them.
Learn to balance your nervous system
Learn to get moving (especially if you have Lymphedema)
Learn to become your own hero, on the daily, managing your vagus nerve, soothing your soul and body, and oxygenating your brain. Oh! What a time to be alive.
Sessions go for about 30 minutes and include grounding. You tell me what you want to feel and I’ll recommend a breathwork technique for you. Pick a card, any card.
While everyone else is racking up credit card bills, you are chilling in your air-conditioned home, breathing fresh, filtered air, drinking fresh, filtered water, and regulating your nervous system.
So when they ask you what you’ve been doing to look and feel so chill, just tell ‘em “My reticular-activating system (RAS) is on fleek.” I like to ask my friends if the book I am reading makes my RAS look big.